We've tested a lot of chat programs, and most start to choke and fail once you get about 20 users chatting at the same time. We have not had this problem with 123flashchat on a dedicated server. This system also has lots of options for customizing they way the different parts can work, or be turned off, giving lots of robust options.
Our users have been enjoying this system more than the simpler ones we have tried, it has been worth the investment to get the pro version for our buddyrpress / wordpress community.
We're currently using 123FlashChat over three years now.
There have been many improvements and changes made over this time and they're really listening to their customers on what could be added to make it even better!
I believe that 123FlashChat could be the future and we'll probably see less and less of chats running on IRC, DigiChat and stuff like that.
There are many ways in which you can customize this software to meet your very own needs.
Overall, I would recommend 123FlashChat.. the alternatives don't even come close to what 123FlashChat offers.
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