I'm listening, just not agreeing ;) and I think you might have misunderstood what's running slow?
Updating. I think you mean I have to see that there's an update on my WP Dashboard, then download the new zip file by going to a webpage, unzip the file, and upload it to the plugin folder (overwriting the old) using FireFTP.
I'm saying that is way more trouble than hitting two 'next/OK' buttons on the WordPress dashboard.
I also don't think that won't fix my problem:
It's the WP Dashboard itself that's sluggish/won't load. The page you get right after you logged in to wp-admin. (So before I do anything with updating and plugins)
The update process itself (once I get to it) actually runs very fast, even through the 'slow' high CPU method. (and I have to admit that I don't really care that it's high CPU, that's what the thing is built to do ;) )
When there is an available update for WP Stats, my WordPress Dashboard pretty much won't load. I log into my wp-admin and then things 'hang' and/or load extremely slow.
It takes a long time to for example click on Posts or Pages and wait for the next page to load, UNTIL I have updated WP Stats. And then everything runs fine again.
I do not have that problem at all with any of the other plugins and available updates for those, so I'm pretty sure something in the WP Stats plugin is causing the sluggishness.